Kitchen Utensils
by Shyro Foxfeather
Summary: [Magic Kaitou] Kaito and the gothic kitchenware.
1. Numero One

Kitchen Utensils

By Shyro Foxfeather

"Aoko… If I didn't know better I'd say you were some kind of weird gothic cook."

Kaito stared at the strange array of shiny black kitchen supplies Aoko had just bought from the local convenient store. She needed to buy new ones given that Kaito had the bad tendency to leave her spatulas and such in the pans as they cooked, resulting in a spoiled meal and a ruined spatula.

Nevertheless, Kaito knew. He knew that they were _evil. _E. V. I. L.

Sinful, Horrible, Malicious, Malevolent, and every other word meant to represent such horrifying things.

But _hot damn_ were they _fun_ to play with!

He could make them explode. Or implode. The wonderful memory of flying kitchenware always gave him an instant maniacal grin that usual sent the people in a ten-foot radius scurrying to safety.

He could burn them. Or melt them.

Or he could use them to spell 'Kaitou Kid Was Here' in Inspector Nakamori's office…

Aoko watched with a wary eye as Kaito poked at the plastic kitchen supplies with maniacal glee shining in his eyes. She sighed and turned to tend to the cooking food with exasperation.

Kaito watched momentarily as she flipped the chicken in the pan for a few seconds before adding some additional seasonings.

Kaito blinked as an idea formed into his head. With a manic grin he picked up the black plastic salad tongs. He leaned forward and without warning pinched them firmly right on Aoko's backside.

A high-pitched squeal erupted from said girl as she glared daggers at the laughing magician. Kaito frowned.

"Why you!" She hollered as she seized her Swiffer mop from the corner and attempted to thwack the boy with it.

"Hey!" Kaito retorted as he dodged the swinging 'Kaito Hazard'. "That's no fair! The stupid plastic couldn't even get through the folds of you stupid skirt!"

Owari

Disclaimer: Nor my minions or I are the caretakers of the animes we engrave stories in paper—or word processor—about. Though soon we will be and you will know when that day has come.

This is an 'All Erin's/Goover's Fault' fanfic.

…Apparently the same scenario happened—save for the comments about evil kitchenware—to her parents. Her mom was the one with the tongs. -Snerks-

-Frowns-

Hollers- How come they never act like that when I'm around?


	2. Numero Two

School Supplies

By Shyro Foxfeather

Kaito idly stood in the role call line as he pulled at his shorts. The Physical Education teacher had insisted that today they were to wear shorts.

Hakuba in ity bity black shorts was quite the interesting site. He had the palest legs in the world. It seemed Hakuba had never considered tanning before.

Then again, why would he?

Kaito glanced around a bit. There really wasn't much to see. Aoko and Akako were on the other side of the fence. And while it would have been easy to sneak away and join the females it was against his sense of self-preservation. Their teacher was damn scary.

Mr. Kyoukasho had sauntered off only to return with a large box in hand. The interest of the entire class was piqued. He pulled out a pair of pale white tong looking things and announced to the class; "Today we are measuring body fat. Get in line."

This did not go over well and many notorious ones cast longing glances towards the fence were surely the girls were in the same predicament.

Hakuba watched warily as Kaito's face split into an ecstatic grin. This did not bode well for the blonde boy's sanity at all. Kaito watched from the corner of his eye until Hakuba had unwisely turned his back while answering a question to a fellow student. The manic trickster crept over to the box and snatched a pair of the weird tongs before the teacher could blink. He stalked up behind his dear friend Mr. Oblivious and pinched his unfortunate backside.

Resulting in a very loud, very girlish squeal.

Which had the heads of the entirety of the class turning heads to see which teen had spontaneously combusted into a girl for them all.

Hakuba, in a fit of irate British fury, gave chase to the manically laughing magician.

"Ha _ha_!I like these short shorts! Much thinner clothe than those stupid skirts! Yatta!" He cried in glee. No doubt that it was maniacal glee.

An embarrassed flush wound it's way over Hakuba's face like an uncoiling snake as many of his pupils gave him very _very _questioning glances.

Owari

Disclaimer: Nor my minions or I are the caretakers of the animes we engrave stories in paper—or word processor—about. Though soon we will be and you will know when that day has come.

I believe there will be a third installment in this. Honestly people, it was meant to be one-shot.

I also apologize for not posting anything for a while. I will try to write more. Perhaps that increase of Vitamin C and Potassium in my diet has anything to do with the new inspiration I have?

Yeah… Yay for Fruit Smoothie drinks!


End file.
